Monday, July 17, 2006

On a lighter note ...

I hate to leave you on such a sour note today, so allow me to redeem myself.

Gentlemen, are y'all aware of the feel-coppage opportunities available to orthopedic doctors? Somehow I hadn't noticed this before, but some of that doctoring is a little ... close. Halfway through, I was thinking he should have bought me dinner beforehand.

First of all, I'm glad I thought to shave this morning, or I would have been very self-conscious. He pushed on my calf muscle in lots of places. Then he had me lie on the table, and he pushed my knees up to my chest one at a time. Then, he kneeled down in front of me and pushed on either side of my hips, sort of crawling downward from my waist.

My brain was doing something like this:

"Oh, jeez, can he tell I'm wearing granny panties? How embarrassing. Wait, he's not thinking about my panties. Or is he?"

When he said "I'd like to see you back here in 10 days," I was like "Ha, I bet you would." I'm just kidding. I was really like: note to self, no granny panties on July 26.


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